Rule Number 6 - Lighten Up!

“red number neon signage” by Karolina Szczur on Unsplash

A lot of you are probably thinking, what is Rule Number 6? Others are probably thinking what happened through 1 through 5? There are no other rules.

Benjamin Zander described Rule Number 6 in his book The Art of Possibilities. Here is a vignette from one of his talks and he describes rule number 6 how it came into play. I have been keeping Rule Number 6 as guidance with the blogs I have been creating. It has been helping me remain grounded (what?!? I don’t have more followers? WTF!) reminding me to keep from being too serious. It allows me to enjoy this more, being slightly less competitive and hopefully making it enjoyable for those that discover these readings.

Stop being so serious

For that matter, what does it mean to be so serious? How can anyone be so serious? I remember as a younger dude and saying “serious as a heart attack” — I suppose that is pretty damn serious. A simple project management trick to determine seriousness — imagine and plan for the worst case scenario. These can be dates, results, or funding. In the context of your “seriousness” is it really as bad as a situation that you are in? Now to balance the worse-case, think about the absolute best-case scenario. How far away from that are you? Now reassess your current situation, scale it 1 to 10 with 10 being serious measuring against your worse-case and best-case imaginations, is it really that serious? Simply put, quit taking yourself so seriously.

“shallow focus photo of assorted clothes” by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Stop acting like the world is going to end if you do not get what you need, lighten up, and remember to smile along the way. Sorry, the world really will not end. Check your egocentric perspective. You really are not the center of the universe. Just because you do not have what you want at this moment, does not mean that you will never get it. It gives you a goal, an action, something to work for. It is more rewarding if you have the opportunity to work for that reward. It really is ok. You will make it. Take a breath and lighten up. Now smile.

Recognize that these reduced levels of seriousness do not mean to be passive. It is not an excuse to be complacent either. You can still remain intense, you most definitely can certainly remain disciplined and use those habits to drive and complete your goals. Just be realistic about it. Look at it from a more cosmic sense, are your actions, the thrashing about ones and the semi-successes (semi because you keep having to fix stuff you mess up going too fast) going to matter in five years if you get it done by killing yourself today. What if you take your time, go slow and smooth, and complete it in due course with less correction?

We want our legacy to expand beyond our lifespan, but we can only do so if we are a producer, and have fun doing it. Stop being a slug. Stop being a consumer. Stop being a sheep. Do extraordinary actions, without passivity, but with passion and discipline. Yet, always remember Rule Number 6 in your effort to become a producer — you don’t be a jerk. Don’t be a boor as a producer. In the effort of being a producer, one that does not take themselves too seriously, and shares their activities freely builds relationships. Remember relationships matter and when you are crazy out of your head, people are going to stay away from you.

Can you relate?

Slow down take a deep breath, laugh, keep trying and find a solution.

I find myself trying to go too fast. Forcing it. Even as I write some of these blogs, I come back later and look at what I wrote, and just shake my head.

What the heck was that all about? Why do (did) I write that tripe?

Sometimes (obviously), it just happens to be what came out of my head at that moment and ended up on the screen at that moment. I suppose it is my effort to use the Pensieve in the Harry Potter books, pulling memories and experiences out of my head and trying to do something with them. To share them with friends, family, peers, and future generations that are sure to be taking care of me when I decide to retire. Sure, the ego wants to have thousands of readers (you are damn right). In this, I just hope to make one person better. Someone who can then make more people better leveraging my experiences and mistakes to help advance their activities. A toolbox of experiences that someone can use to help get more things accomplished and to be more effective.

Yet, with Rule Number 6 — who cares?

I suppose I do. I am getting something out of it psychologically. Socially. It is part of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, that self-actualization.

…and who cares if anyone else reads it….

Go forth and be brilliant.