Say Please and Thank You

Why are we always at each other’s throats?

Why have we all become evil?

Is it really that hard to say “Please” and “Thank You” in today’s world? Heck, even saying “hi” or “Hello” to someone you do not know is becoming frowned upon. I do not think that we have become so self-absorbed that we cannot even extend a simple courtesy to our fellow humans. Take the time and effort to learn these simple phrases. Please and Thank You can go a long way when you are trying to build relationships.

“please dont try to sleep here signage” by Maria Freyenbacher on Unsplash

“May we please have guidance on how to be more polite?”

Most certainly! Thank you for asking!

1. Remember that you are always learning how to listen and understand. When you hear someone speaking, you should listen to what their words mean. The intent. If you do not understand what they are trying to say, please be sure to ask them to help you better understand. It may be necessary for you to explain what your perspective is, but be polite, patient, and kind.
2. When someone does something kind, something as simple as holding the door, it really is OK to say, “thank you!” The selfless act of someone holding the door, or helping someone, the random act of kindness seems to be lost. Is it because we think we are too busy to help? Or is it that there is no monetary reward to help? Try being self-actualized and allowing the simple phrase of “thank you” to wash over you and accept it for that. A polite recognition that you have helped, or you use it to recognize the help you have received.

Remember, as children, and some of us use it with our children, that we were coached to realize the power of “please.”

Say the magic word! No, not Abracadabra.

Please helps show respect and consideration to the person we are asking, especially when you say it for real. Not the “puhhleease” in an exasperated sense, nor like Roger Rabbit’s version. Saying it with respect, gets you more respect in return. With a certain chance, the results of your ask will be fulfilled. Your respect shows that you are aware of their busy schedules, and their own activities that may not align with your efforts. Please helps pave that road to a strong relationship.

When we say thank you, it also engenders the respect and kindness that we would expect if we helped someone. Now we do not want to tack on an arbitrary “thank you” to the assistance we have received as it would be immediately dismissed as “he really didn’t mean it” thoughts of the recipient. You need to use thank you as respectfully and with all sincerity as you do with please. Thank you is a reward for both the giver and the receiver. It is also a method to reinforce good behavior. To ensure the value of thank you is received well, be sure to look the person in the eye when you say it — the strength of that action will go much further than the words alone.

Overall, if we use please and thank you more consistently, people will want to be around us more. If you have direct employees that support your team, using please and thank you will develop stronger relationships and they will want to work harder and do better next time. When you provide feedback, you must use the please and thank you statements to ensure the feedback is received appropriately with the weight you intended. Additionally, there has been research that suggests those who use please and thank you consistently are happier people. That is a reward in itself!

“rectangular brown wooden framed chalkboard with thank you note” by rawpixel on Unsplash

“Thank you for providing guidance on how to be more polite.”

Please go forth and be brilliant! Thank you!