Seeking Coastal Utopia

When our boss* comes to us to ask you to do something, do you ever say no? It is probably depending on which boss that it is, but most of us probably say “yes” and do the work.  We say "yes" even though we already have a plateful of work in front of us, and falling behind on the similar work. It is rare that a person says “no” to the boss and we need to figure out how that balance can be beneficial for both relationships. For those of you that say “no” outright, this is for you, too. “You are the best and I need you to get this done” by rawpixel on  Unsplash Most people realize that work is necessary. It provides us with the currency to purchase stuff. Important stuff like food, shelter, and clothing . It allows us to purchase things we want too, the toys like a medium format digital camera or a tranquility pod . We do not want to lose that opportunity to earn that paycheck. We do what we can to provide the right answer to keep us in good graces with th...

I always have to do things that I don’t want to do in life and work. Things that are not even close to being described as “fun.” More often than not, every time we have someone telling us to do something we want to rebel, especially if we know it is not fun. “man pouring coffee in a white mug” by Nathan Dumlao on  Unsplash Our response? Screw you! Don’t tell me what to do! Yet, conversely, the things that we don’t want to do are often the right things that we should do . What is the right thing to do? The right thing is always the right thing! Yeah, thanks for the sage advice Fisher. Sheesh. When we talk about the right thing, we talk about behaviors that allow us to be prosocial: actions that build relationships and to make good connections with our fellow humans or to be one with our environment. These behaviors allow us to make our work friends happier and more effective because we did the right thing. Can you think of one thing that is not fun but you ...

“Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.”―  Mark Twain Photo by  David Clode  on  Unsplash Meaning — you really need to do the hardest thing first. Period. End of story. Stop arguing. Just shut up and get to work. It’s hard. It’s difficult to  get motivated  to do something that is challenging. You are afraid of trying to do something hard.  You are afraid that you will fail .  There are different schools of thought about what should be done first, on what sequence you should do certain tasks, but realistically you need to do the hardest things first. Why? Because I said so. Now with that, I don’t mean just jumping right in, tearing it open, trying to get it completed haphazardly. Sound and fury mean nothing. You still need to plan and understand the steps that are necessary to do those hard things. You would not just walk into the gym and deadlift 500 pounds, you would hurt...

Boomerang Effect NO! Not the social psychology term which is best described as “ reverse psychology .” Boomerangs. Everyone has the mental image of the boomerang. The bent and shaped piece of wood with Aboriginal origins? The shaped stick, the one that is designed to return to it’s thrower if enough energy is remaining from the launch? We aren’t going to talk about the hunting versions, but of the returning version. Did you know that the boomerang has the same behavior characteristics as business and relationships? Do you know how bomerangs work ? Have you ever tried to throw one ? Do you even know how to throw one ? Understanding how to exert the right amount of force in the right direction will bring the boomerang back to the thrower. You can’t go and fling it as hard as you can without direction and expect success, it crashes violently or fails to fly correctly. Nor can you throw it lightly , not giving the right amount of energy it deserves as it will not have enough en...