Seeking Coastal Utopia

It is ok to be wrong. Suck it up. Own your mistake . Be a big kid and recognize you were wrong and move on. Holding a grudge does not win friends and creates a toxic environment for everyone around you and relationships suffer . You were wrong. Do not try to blame anyone else. Do not deflect it. Own it. “look what I can do! What? I’m peacocking?” photo by Kelly Sikkema on  Unsplash Swallowing your pride can also be about doing something that you may believe is beneath you. Like carrying out your own office trash. Sure, you have been there in the business since God was a kid, so what? Do something that is human, something that is not designated as cognitive dissonance. Stop trying to remind everyone that you are better than that. Swallow your pride. The key behind swallowing your pride is taking action to remedy it. Note “action” in that sentence. You made a decision and you are choosing to do something about it. Even though you may be embarrassed. You may feel it is show

It’s okay. We still love you. You do not always have to win. There are those of us who are competitive, and then there are those of us who are really, really competitive. The ones that cannot stand to lose. The ones that absolutely, barring any cost, consideration, or rules, must win. Must. “I love winning” photo by Japheth Mast on  Unsplash In the effort of trying to win everything every time you burn bridges, you destroy friendships, you make relationships suffer. Winning at all costs is not a rational decision. Inter arma enim silent leges — Cicero ~60AD Specifically translated — “f or among [times of] arms, the laws fall mute .” Loosely interpreted as ignoring the rules, win no matter what, win at all costs. Winning. Winning is the only option in your eyes. You always have the first word, always having the last word, always being right — even when wildly wrong. Making your point louder does not mean it is more right. Talking over the top of others is not makin

This has to be one of my most favorite phrases ever. This is a prominent phrase stated by the character Zedd in the Sword of Truth ( series by Terry Goodkind ( Wizard’s First Rule , Chapter 7, page 77). For some reason, I have loved this remark primarily because it is so true and its simplicity. Nothing is ever easy. “Oh, maybe this is easy?” photo by Tommy Lisbin on  Unsplash Remember the first time that you tried something new? How much you struggled with it? You (your ego) may have mentally gone into it thinking, “ oh this is a piece of cake! ” Then you quickly realized as you started spending more time with it, that you underestimated the amount of effort that was required to be able to take onto this task. Oops. Well, that was not as easy as I thought . Now we need lean the words of Theodore Roosevelt for his take on the “easy” button. “Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty… I have never in my life envied

Your face is bathed in a white-blue glow. This is the mask of the 21st century. “are you allowing your children to grow up this way?” photo by Ludovic Toinel on  Unsplash Who are you? Are you the same person that is represented on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or Snapchat? Are you the same person when you are face-to-face? Or are you hiding behind an electronic mask, where the online-personality presents someone who is different than what you portray in the real world? “Guy Fawkes mask” by Samuel Zeller on  Unsplash This is a world where many of us seem to present ourselves differently online, using electronic anonymity. Is it because we are unhappy with who we are when we are at work? Or are we afraid? Is the online persona a different person when you are home? Why? Has the chameleon effect taken over when you are online with your “friends?” Is it healthy that we all have multiple faces, but the one in public is someone else? Too often we have seen someone post

Whose eyes are you seeing the problem through? Whose perspective are you taking when you propose a solution? Are you sure that you are doing the right thing for the end-user, the customer, the person you are trying to understand? “Will this help magnify their worldview?” Photo by Ronan on  Unsplash Understanding and accomplishing an empathetic viewpoint is imperative for success. Being able to see the problem from their eyes, within their world, is necessary for building strong relationships , adoption, and overall change management. How many times has something changed within your business? The way you used to access something, or the software or hardware that you came to depend upon worked well. The system you were comfortable with? And. It. Has. Changed. Here comes the Information Technology team within your organization, almost out of the blue. They are here to solve a problem that you did not realize even existed. To provide you with a solution without understa

Every vote counts. Every single one. Hence the word “count”, as in tally, calculation, enumerate, add together, or totalize. “Go get your exclusive sticker” Photo by Element5 Digital on  Unsplash Go! Vote! NOW! Why would you choose not to vote? You need to be engaged in your community, in your town, city, county, state and the United States. If you do not vote, where else would you have any say? Where else is your voice being heard? Do you know who your local representatives are? Or what initiatives are running in your voting precinct? How can you affect change — and “because I said so” is usually not received very well. “why are you sitting there — get out and vote!” photo by Dylan McLeod on  Unsplash Sitting in the armchair, railing against the television or the Internet, against your local news feed, shrieking of how screwed up things are — what did you do to make a change? Did you vote? Are you even registered to vote ? What are you waiting for? Go register a

How many of you have heard of the Pareto Principle? Many of you do not know who or what Pareto is all about. “these are easier to do because of Pareto” photo by Giorgio Tomassetti on  Unsplash Vilfredo Federico Damaso Pareto was born into this world in the mid 19th century and died in the early 20th century. However, his contributions have long lived on, making the lives of engineers, sociologists, and economists much simpler due to his identification of the distribution that is now known as the Pareto Principle. The Pareto Principle is simply described as the 80/20 rule. It can apply to a number of generalities and allow you to quickly estimate (versus calculate) distribution or allow you to understand proportional values of something quickly, without having to do the deep dive calculations to multiple decimal points. Pareto Distributions occur naturally; it certainly occurs with humans and our activities. “20% is one portion and the 50&+30% gives us the 80%” by Artem

Something happened. Something got broken, something was ruined, something did not go as planned. Now what? “I have to hurry up and do this wrong!” photo by Christopher Johnson on  Unsplash Freak out! Nooo-oo. Can we just stop and give up? Again, no. Absolutely not! No, you cannot curl up into a fetal position and start sucking your thumb either. You need to get up, put on your big kid pants, and make a decision to move forward quickly, to recover. If anything, we gained wisdom. We now know something new! We are able to learn from that experience! We now know what NOT to do next time and we probably now know what we need to do next. Or maybe we really don’t? Your project has gone sideways and you are out of money and is significantly underwater. The staff has too many other competing priorities, is it freak out time? Certainly — but only a little. It is what it is. You cannot change what has happened. You can not change the past. Now what? Embrace what

Are you sure that you are doing the right thing? “Should I make dinner or weld the trailer frame?” photo by Christopher Burns on  Unsplash What is the right thing? Whatever it is, are you sure you are supposed to be doing what you are doing right now? How did you get to this point, and not realize that you are working (or not working) on the right thing? I struggle with this myself even as I sit here and write this blog. I believe I should be exercising, using fitness as a stress reducer, using it to remain healthy. Staying healthy so I can provide for my family. Watch my children grow old. Should that be the most important thing? the pendulum continues to swing… photo from the Omnibus Theater My problem is the pendulum swings too far and I either spend too much time pasted to the computer working or creating blogs or I spend too much time exercising, running down the miles. I rarely ever find that right balance which forces me to ask — am I doing the right thing, today?

Wake up! “do not let this escape” photo by Adrien Robert on  Unsplash This is not about getting enough sleep or using music or yoga or exercise to help someone wake from their dance with the Sandman, this is about us as a society turning a blind eye to things around us, ignoring the opportunities we have to make a change. Why have we turned into a society that is completely unconscious and underwater? It is though we hardly care about what is happening today, let alone tomorrow. Time for us to wake up. Time for us to take a step forward and make a significant change in our work and our lives today. Believe we can make a difference in our lives. We need to make the conscious choice to do something positive in our lives. What is happening right now that you can support? What is happening right now that you can take action on? What are you afraid of? “this plucky robot had the guts to try something new” photo by Dominik Scythe on  Unsplash Most of us go through life mech